The thing about feelings. It is like an enormous hexagonal shaped diamond plant in our heart. It functions brilliantly if people just let it be because it shines, producing a spectrum full of colours helplessly whenever sunlight travels into the object. Just like the emotions from our heart when a scenario had happened-A furious and stressful father, a scared and nervous brother going for war and a loving mom kissing a child's forehead before he sleeps. All of these creates something beautiful in life. There will be ups and downs, fairness and unfairness, life and death, love and hate but life is full of surprises. Life is like a road trip. Life is like going into a supermarket without any shopping list and just getting items you never thought of. Life is like a black bird flying wherever it can- north, south, east, west.
But once there was a man who told his son'' Toughen up boy! Boys do not cry. It embarrasses me that you are fucking weak''. So he did what everyone would automatically do right after having been told off by his own father. He stopped crying, cared less and ignored the consequences thinking he is a brave man with a metallic heart...not forgetting buried feelings. Every question asked by his dad was always a '' Yes/No sir or Yes/No Mr''. He was more like an employee than a son. It went on like this for a long time because when we were young, your dad was a superman. Your dad was someone special on a rare baseball card. Your dad was a celebrity on the Oprah Winfrey show.
Then, one day after coming back from university, he saw his old man cried in the general hospital. The mother/wife has just died due to a brain tumour. That point of time, tears were streaming down his porcelain face. The tears flowed like a waterfall till it turned into drops, dripping internally and gently to the metallic heart. The metals were slowly ripping apart till the heart can be seen glowing. The warmth, guilt and pleasant feeling. After awhile, it shone so bright like a set of fireworks lit up at night during a new year. The son, Jamie hugged his dad and told his dad '' It's alright dad.'' They remained like that for a few minutes. Both of them didn't want to let go of each other. They suddenly thought of their son/brother who never came back after the war too. This is real they thought. It wasn't a bad dream.
A Speech At The Funeral.
''..I was wrong, J. So wrong. Every man has the right to feel whatever they want...My wife, my lover, you'll be home..where the heart is''. He pointed up to the sky with his index finger and looked at the mourners for a few seconds. ''We bury and neglect every feeling inside thinking it is wise decision to do so. We usually engulf the sadness and only give a smirk when we are happy. All those feelings will eventually develop a heavy chest. It is like drinking vast amount of whisky but instead of fucking up the liver. It is destroying the heart. When sunlight travels into a piece of diamond, a burst of colours are formed..just like feelings pumped out from the heart. Enjoy that moment when it is at bliss, make it a lesson when you are disappointed or sad. Just let it be. You are not man enough? No that's not right. Are you human enough to have felt it?''
