It was just me and that Schnauzer, alone in the living room. That dog is a wonderful listener I must say. I didn’t even bother if it could understand me. I just needed some living creature listening to me because mostly all the humans who are living are already dead inside, like a robot with a customize computer chip placed on the back of their heads, programmed with instructions on what they ought to do.So there I was, whispering to the dog while playing some random tune on the guitar. The dog was lying down on the ground, looking at me thinking how strange I was at night than in the morning. Maybe it is that artificial invisible mask we humans wear everyday. After talking for an hour or so, with tears rolling down from my sleepy eyes to my cheeks, I say no more. I slept. It was just one of the best feeling ever to let everything out and suddenly realize how ridiculous your problems were because there are other people somewhere else in this world who have real and solemn problems which they have no chance to control it.
I am trying to navigate my flaws to somewhere else but as a sailor, there are strong tidal waves smashing into my robust ship. It wasn’t as compact as before when I first had it. Unfortunately, it is much weaker now but I am really trying to repair every holes and every dented surfaces so I wouldn’t sink beneath the ocean. Because my organs, thoughts and feelings are my crew and I can’t just let them down. I want a sign to really believe that hope and faith is the truth and that it is astonishingly beautiful like an island with so much greenery and golden sand on the grounds whenever I come across it when sailing. I want to travel and experience the external surroundings and will be appreciating every second of it if I was given the chance.
..I kind of realize the next day that whatever I said last night, I couldn’t even remember mostly of what it felt like at that very moment when I was just talking aimlessly. It’s really like champagne where usually people make a toast and drink a full glass of it and that’s it. You enjoy and let it go. You felt it once and you won’t feel it again unless you drink some more.
